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Adopting Brownie, a Foster Fail

I’ve always had a fascination for cats from the time I was little. One of the many cat-related stories of me as a child was how I catnapped several kittens without my dad’s knowledge. We were followed by what seems to be their mother and rightfully so, I had returned them to her.

Fast forward to when I met my then boyfriend (now husband), I found out he had dogs most of his life and loves cats too, naturally we would often fantasize about having pets, and how many fur kids we’d have in our household.

Re-enactment of how I catnapped several kittens. I could only find 1 for this.

Expectation

The moment we’ve successfully applied for our HDB flat, and started moving in, plans for pawrenthood slowly began taking shape. Because of his lifelong experience with dogs and family drama of not having everyone on board, he was rather adamant about ensuring I was prepared for a life with pets – as I’ve never lived alongside cats or dogs while growing up.

It’s clear as day we’ve been bewitched by cats.

We were determined to go by the adoption route as we both have strong opinions on that.  From following our local Facebook cat groups, we’ve gleaned lots of information and made plans to find a cat at an adoption drive or from a Cat Welfare Society (CWS) or SPCA related event. 

From their Facebook pages and friends, we understood that they have rather stringent adoption guidelines about the readiness of your home: especially if your home has been cat-proofed with the necessary window hardware for pet safety in highrise apartments, or houseplants that pose a risk to cats, etc.

An important laundry list of considerations before thinking about having a cat.

We’ve also been concerned about the realities of cost and how we would be involved with the cat’s life. Whether we could give the best to the cat and that we may not be ready for a long time. Day to day costs and medical costs may be borne by the fosterers alone. So on top of time and effort, money is also an important factor in our decision.

Reality

It was August 2017. After boarding our flight and waiting for the plane to take off, I was thumbing through my Facebook feed when I came across a friend’s social post, looking for somebody to help foster an abandoned cat. 

I turned to my husband seated next to me:

“You’ve always wanted a Siamese cat…?”

Just before takeoff; the idea took off.

He had a good look at the pictures, and shrugged, “Well, if it’s just fostering for the time being, why not?”

At that time, we had thought fostering this brown kitty would be a great opportunity to learn about cat ownership, before committing to adopting one. Little did we know, we were wrong in some ways. ?

Once we returned home, I reached out to my friend to offer our help. After being added to a Whatsapp group with a direct line to Brownie’s rescuers, we finally arranged a day for this brown cat to be transported.

Day 1: Brownie Beckons

The rescuers understood we are first-time cat owners, so they had kindly packed a “starter kit” to help make the transition smooth. The starter kit included a tiny litter box, feeding bowls, about 2 weeks worth of kitten kibble and canned food, some toys and a scratching board.

Til this day, we’re using this particular feeding bowl for dry kibble. Stainless steel for the win.

Before Brownie was put in our care, we read several articles suggesting keeping new cats in one room for a couple days before letting them go about. This was to ensure the cat had enough time to adjust to her new surroundings before showing her the rest of the place. Brownie took off on her own and claimed every conceivable spot for herself in just a couple days. We then decided to purchase extra supplies should her next forever home take some time to happen. 

“Are you SURE this is gonna last…?” – Brownie

It was then, while shopping for extra supplies, my husband had made up his mind – because he felt it wasn’t fair for Brownie to be bounced from home to home if we were only fostering for a month or slightly more. Also, it happens that he often works from home by himself and boy, does it get lonely. 

A day in the life of a lonely man, begrudgingly accompanied by his feline companion

We were so transparent when asking for deals on pet supplies, the rescuers immediately caught on we were going to keep her long term. Though at that point in time we were still iffy about this big decision, the rescuers know we’ve been caught hook, line and sinker.

A week or two 2 months had passed, and we announced Brownie as our own. She has officially become what among cat circles is dubbed as a “foster fail”.

Day 1: “I love this place, thank you uwu”
Day 60: “Kneel before me, lousy peasant”

We also kept her name Brownie, to pay tribute to the rescuers who had christened her as such.

Til this day, we have never regretted having Brownie by our side.

“BUT WHAT ABOUT ME?! I regret the day I had no say in my furrever family!!!” – Brownie

From here on out

I can only write what I know through the experience of other friends who have successfully sent out their foster cats to loving homes. 

In a normal fostering situation, the cat moves out of the foster home to their furrever families. The fosterers and rescuers will be communicating regularly to keep each other current on what’s happening. 

Before COVID19, adoption drives were often organized, and hopefully we can return to that soon. It is the responsibility of fosterers to ensure the cats are healthy, disease & parasite free and well groomed so they can be put out to furrever homes in the best condition. 

The new normal for adoption drives, in the current COVID19 situation.

If fosterers are inclined and well connected, they could get spots in adoption drives on their own, or they can easily coordinate with rescuers to secure spots for their cats. 

The actual adoption process itself may be less straightforward, and dare I say such a process requires the alignment of the stars. Potential adopters may need to be screened, have their living conditions checked and past adoption history reviewed. However that topic is an entire series of articles on its own and I’m sure we can expand more on that in the future.

Once the adopters have been screened and the papers signed, it is time to bid teary goodbyes to your foster cat with whom you’d probably have bonded over the last few weeks or months. But don’t let that stop you from fostering. Fostering is a worthy cause, and it has a positive impact on both the cats, and the communities at large.


ABOUT THE AUTHOR

Anna’s a cat slave to three ex-street cats Brownie, Beth and Boba.

Holla at Brownie and the gang at @brownbethboba on Instagram!

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Community Stories

Adopting a skittish & fearful dog – Mayo

Around November 2019, we felt ready for a new addition to our family. Being first-time owners, we had a lengthy discussion and started doing our homework on costs, training and responsibilities, pros/cons of adopting vs buying and etc. It was then we started scrolling through the websites of various shelters and that’s where we came across Mayo’s profile on Save our Street Dogs (SOSD). To be completely honest, we were still in the initial phases of looking around.. And so we decided to join SOSD’s bi-monthly shelter tour to learn more about the street dogs and the work they do. 

The first time we saw Mayo in the shelter

We managed to spot Mayo among the rows and rows of kennels and even in real life she captured our hearts with her gentleness – a stark contrast to the crazy intense barking and jumping up and down going on in around stressful shelter environment. Long story short, we went down for the next 7 weeks to interact with her and learn more about her before deciding to bring her home on 1st Feb 2020.

Mayo when it was time to go for walks in the shelter
Trying to take Mayo out for a walk on Day 2.

Despite knowing that she was fearful on walks (and pretty much all the time, and of all things hahaha), we still took her for a home trial thinking that the home environment would be better for her. We were NOT prepared for what was to come.. oppps! The first few days were the toughest – she wouldn’t walk and we couldn’t leash her. She howled and cried in the middle of the night and held her pee and poop for hours. And the moment the leash went on with the slightest tug to get her moving, she would pee and shit all over the house on the way out. Our walks were literally 5 mins a day.  At one point it was a 2 man job just to get her out of the house – one of us had to hold on to a crate to lure her to walk, while the other one held on to her leash. We tried allowing her to pee/poop indoors but she did not take to that either. We had a hard conversation and decided that we might not be able to keep her if it was a 2 man job just to get her out to do her business everyday. 

Thank the heavens though! We decided to try our best before the end of the trial and reached out to @dawkstar for help. Within 5 mins of their assessment, Mayo suddenly??? suddenly??? walked on the leash with the help of another lead dog. Hooray! Back at home everyday was a slow improvement and today we are happy to report she walks to the door confidently to get leashed. Despite the odds that were still stacked against us, we adopted her officially on 14th February 2020. It would have been cruel to send her back to an environment she was clearly stressed out in after merely seeing her walk.

Well, it has been almost 7 months since Mayo came into our lives. Unfortunately, for the first 5 months at home, Mayo was perpetually stuck on her bed. She wouldn’t move from her bed unless it was walk time or eat time. We hand-fed her every meal in hopes of building a relationship quicker; we sat next to her everyday for a few minutes just to get her familiar with us. If you ask me, she was not a dog. It is also one of the most painful feelings to see a dog constantly in a state of fear, anxiety & insecurity. She had toys to play with! She had yummy treats to eat! She had a shelter over her head and a nice comfortable bed to sleep on at night. We even put in the work everyday to help condition her, interact with her and try to help her. But she didn’t know how to enjoy the new life she had and emotionally it was so so so tough on us. Of course we wanted to enjoy her – that’s why we all get a dog right? Companionship? Friendship? We longed to hug her, pet her, play with her, take her out to the beach, meet our friends and family – but couldn’t. Some days (even till now), we wonder if she will ever come of her shell and be a normal dog that knows how to enjoy affection, play, have fun and be freed from her fearful and anxious state of mind. But! She has come very far. In the last 2 months, we’ve seen her coming up to us to ‘kaypoh’ when there’s food on the table. And just last week, she’s started to feel confident enough to vocalize and make her little barks heard! She has also been enjoying occasional head rubs when she’s in the mood and getting more confident walking around the house in our presence. We’ve even had a nice cafe dinner with a fellow dog-owner on Friday 🙂 For a dog who’s been literally a piece of furniture in the house, watching her leave her bed for whatever reason is a huge win for us. So even though she has yet to wag her tail or greet us at the door, we are going to celebrate the small victories and believe that it will come one day, with time 🙂

We have received tons of support through the Singapore Specials community and the dog community in general. Lots of fellow pawrents drop us encouraging notes, tips and sometimes just really kind messages to acknowledge the effort we have put in and how Mayo has progressed since Day 1. I would love to share with fellow pawrents on how we have worked with her in hopes to help other people in the same boat but that’s going to be another lengthy post for another time.

Till then, follow us on Instagram @mayothedogo to watch our progress and share in our successes and failures! We are not dog trainers, but if what we do can inspire you to do something different, we say GO FOR IT! Don’t give up on your pup, it will be worth it in the end.

Mayo signing off!

The above article is written by the hooman of @mayothedogo.